Ayahuasca Ceremony #230: Time to Fly (Releasing Fear of Failure)

Ayahuasca Ceremony #230: Time to Fly (Releasing Fear of Failure)

This fear of failure, it actually sounded like depths of some of the more fear-based aspects of religion passed on through the roots of our generations, still deeply seeped in the collective consciousness. The concept of not being inherently valuable…I have to...
The Layer Above My Soul: New Relationship, Old Triggers

The Layer Above My Soul: New Relationship, Old Triggers

The old relationship triggers are still ready to fight. Early on I developed the “fantasy” defense, the “white picket fence, over the top romantic, save-me-from-myself” kind of deal. She personified as a combination of domesticated June...
Six-Month Collective Consciousness Purge Completion: A Humble Wow

Six-Month Collective Consciousness Purge Completion: A Humble Wow

This is still raw, but the belief system is actively shifting underneath me, even as I write I can feel it’s thick, slow movement. But clearing out this collective consciousness purge in order to actually see it gave me the ability to shine light on it, soften...
Ayahuasca Ceremony #225/ Plant Diet #8: Do What it Takes 

Ayahuasca Ceremony #225/ Plant Diet #8: Do What it Takes 

The question is, am I in service or not? Am I willing to do what it takes to be in spiritual service? I feel like it’s “selling in” (vs. “selling out”) – like a Peruvian mother who sacrifices time with her children to work in the US...
Ayahuasca Ceremony #221/ Plant Diet #8: Cement Layers of US Consciousness Cracking 

Ayahuasca Ceremony #221/ Plant Diet #8: Cement Layers of US Consciousness Cracking 

But longing is not honoring the love at all. It is honoring the fear. It is a way of distracting. It is a way from avoiding feeling the feelings I may have actually been feeling underneath, which for me, would be a self-fulfilling prophecy of the self-doubt that...